Going Green with a Little Help from My Friends

I'd like to start off by thanking everyone for responding so well to my last post. I received nothing but positivity and support, and it made me feel incredibly loved. Some people could personally relate to my experiences or had friends who did. I know now that I am certainly not alone. None of us are.

Sharing experiences and working with other people is a major part of life. It gives us confidence and helps us to move forward together. Recently, I was privileged enough to work with other students at my university to take the first step toward making a big change on campus.

As one of the leaders of Students for an Environmentally Active Campus (SEAC), the environmental club at Marquette, I've been working on an initiative to get the university to stop selling disposable plastic water bottles (since they're bad for our health, our wallets, and our planet--more on that here). SEAC has been working hard to raise awareness and collect signatures to show support for the Take Back the Tap campaign.

As part of the campaign, we've been working on getting water bottle refilling stations installed around campus to encourage the use of reusable personal water bottles. At first, progress was slow and I began to feel discouraged, but the other SEAC members energized me with their fresh ideas and passion.

We came into contact with some of the senators in student government and started a partnership to get legislation for refilling stations to pass. It was an intense few weeks and both SEAC members and the senators worked extremely hard. After countless hours of researching, sending emails, writing, and practicing, I was one of four SEAC representatives to present to the entire student senate. After watching the debate the followed, I got to witness the voting process as well as the result: the bill passed at a vote of 26-4.

I was never prouder to be a member of SEAC (which I've been involved in for three years) than at that moment. The collaboration, mutual support, and reaching out beyond our own members resulted in something that will hopefully outlast the current students at Marquette. It was exciting to work together toward a common goal, because our collective voice was much stronger than any of us would have been alone.

Recognizing the talents in yourself is extremely important, but it's also beneficial to recognize the talents in others. Building relationships to accomplish things elevates each individual and creates something new. Why not go out and make a few friends?

Warning: This Will Be a Long Read

I've been going back and forth for weeks on whether or not to post this and, after making probably hundreds of edits, finally got the courage to just go for it. It’s not too often that I feel the tendril-like fingers of prejudice wrapping around me, but it does happen. And it hurts. Whether for reasons of race, sex, religion, sexual orientation, or other characteristics of a person, treating someone as an outsider only hurts everyone involved. This post is meant to be a lighthearted example to get people to consider what prejudice really is and how it can creep into our lives without our awareness. We are not immune from feeling prejudice against us, and we are not immune from dishing it out. But we can change that if we train ourselves to see and hear the little things that bring people down, and instead build one another up, brick by brick.

Solving Sobriety

I’m a 21-year-old college student living in Wisconsin. I go to bars almost every weekend. I party with my friends. I’ve danced on tables and sang karaoke at the top of my lungs. Oh yeah, and I don’t drink any alcohol.

There’s a certain stereotype that goes with a chronic non-drinker. We all know what it is: dull, party-pooper, judgmental, fearful, great at holding your hair back when you’re about to puke, etc. I’m here to shed some light on the subject by offering a few tips on how to navigate some simple interactions with us pesky sober folks.

“Wait, you haven’t been drinking?”

The first moment you realize a friend doesn’t drink is a special one. This is the crucial moment when you will either come off as awesome or annoying. If you laugh about the fact that your friend can be that crazy without being drunk and then go back to your activities, you’re in the clear. If you get all weird and start treating your friend like a completely different person, however, you’re entering dangerous waters.

“No judgment, but…”

Stop. Just leave this phrase out of your vernacular when you’re talking to a sober person. If you have to clarify that you’re not judging, whatever you say next is going to sound even more judgmental. Just speak your mind and deal with the judgment issues later.

“…Why don’t you drink?”

This usually follows the “No judgment, but” clause. It’s a perfectly acceptable question if you’re genuinely curious, but please don’t expect an elaborate story about a drinking binge gone wrong that turned me off the stuff. My reasons aren’t that interesting. Let’s turn the tables. If a sober person came up to you and asked, “Why do you drink?” you would probably think it’s an odd question at best and an offensive one at worst. You might answer, in the simplest terms, “Because I like to and I want to.” A sober person’s answer is similar: “I don’t drink because I don’t like to and I don’t want to.” That person owes you no more explanation than that.

“Is it cool if I drink?”

Nope. We all must do the exact same thing in the exact same way if we are to hang out together. Seriously? No one actually thinks like that! I’ll do me, you do you. We’re cool.

“Am I making you uncomfortable?”

You weren’t until you asked that question.

 “Are you sure you don’t want anything?”

I’m so glad you asked! All these years of not drinking could have been prevented if only someone had offered me a jager bomb a second time! Honestly, I’m a big girl. If I magically decide that I want to start drinking, I will go up to the bar and get myself a drink. No need to hold my hand.

If these examples seem rather negative, don’t worry. There is one sure-fire way to have an awesome time with Sober Sally: treat her like a person. If she weren’t having a blast, she would leave. Have fun together. Include her in your shenanigans. Convince her to do that ridiculous impression she’s so good at. She wants to fit in and let loose. Let her do that. Don’t reduce her to a stuffy wallflower and don’t turn her into a circus freak. She is your friend and will be whether either of you is drunk or sober.

I should point out that not all non-drinkers are the same. Some are more confident in their choices than others, and some aren’t as touchy about the subject as others. Many comments like the ones above are not made with bad intentions and sober people can usually see that, but it’s best to err on the side of caution. My suggestion is just to respect their choices and enjoy their company.

Here’s the thing: if you think wine is the nectar of the gods, drink it (provided you’re of legal age of course!); if you are taking sips of beer and wincing when your friends look away because it tastes so bad, stop drinking it. If your friends are cool people, they will accept your choices, whatever they are (that goes beyond the realm of drinking and not drinking, by the way).

So I’ll raise my glass of Sprite and you raise your glass of cranberry and vodka, and we’ll toast to doing whatever makes us happy. Cheers!

Happy Chinese New Year!

Last weekend, I co-hosted an early Chinese New Year celebration at my university (technically the new year doesn't start until this Friday). I helped kick off the year of the horse by giving a couple short speeches in Chinese, introducing the performers and running a raffle in English, and even singing a traditional Chinese New Year song. With only one semester of Chinese classes under my belt, the event was both terrifying and invigorating. 

It's still hard for me to believe I got through that two hour long show, which was attended by about 200 people, without any major blunders. I would never have been able to do it without the encouragement of my professor, the pronunciation help from my friend, and the lighthearted attitudes of my co-hosts. It was a group effort, and I pulled off my part as best I could. 

One of my favorite things about learning a new language is that it humbles me. I can't pretend to know everything (or much of anything) because there's no way to fake it, especially among native speakers. I have to ask for help, I have to correct my many mistakes, and I have to be open to learning completely new things. It's hard to cling to a sense of pride when I know a second grader in China is infinitely better at Chinese than I am. 

When that pride is stripped away, it can be scary, but I'm not alone. I have classmates in the exact same boat as me. I think I'm closer with the students in my Chinese class than in any other classes I've taken because we're not really competing; we're collaborating. We practice speaking Chinese with each other, correct each other's work, study together, and even laugh about the silly things our professor does in class on any given day. We have all been reduced to a humbled state and we have no choice but to support and enjoy one another.

Sometimes, people ask me why I'm taking Chinese and I don't always know what to say. Because it will help me get a job? Because I want to go to China someday? Because I like the language? All of those answers are true, but I think the real reason is that I like making connections with people through language. Native speakers appreciate that I'm taking an interest in their culture and language (and get a good laugh in when I try to speak it!), and I become closer with my fellow non-native speakers. Nothing bad comes from learning a new language. 

I think everyone should experience the unique feelings that come with learning something completely new. Chinese may not be for everyone, but learning any language helps people think in new ways and socialize a little differently. It opens the mind to new experiences and usually makes people more accepting of differences. I wish I had started this process earlier in life, but I'm so glad I'm doing it now. Here's to learning new things and making deeper connections in 2014! 新年快乐!

It Was 2013 for Goodness' Sake!

It's the last day of 2013! What a strange feeling. I know this year has been hard for a lot of people, but I'm going to count my blessings. I'd say overall, 2013 was significantly better than 2012.

I think this blog evolved a lot over the course of the past year. I expanded my writing topics beyond my battles with Twitter and discoveries on YouTube to more universal themes like personal and professional growth. I like the direction this blog is taking.

In keeping with the mildly selfish theme of chronicling my journey to becoming a better person, I'd like to reflect on the past year, enjoy the present, and try to see what's in store for my future.

I had some amazing internships this year, where I learned a lot and met some sensational people. I lived in my own apartment during my first Milwaukee summer. I connected with some of my professors and made new friends. I did things I should have been doing since the beginning of my college career, like taking Chinese classes and joining Gospel Choir. I found a new appreciation for my family and cared for the people already in my life. I loved more than ever and successfully dealt with loss and rejection.

I feel like I'm in a good place right now. I don't have all the answers or all my future plans laid out, but I like who I am, who I'm with, and what I'm doing. This year I learned to embrace the present and take each experience as is. Am I still a little freaked out about where I'll live or what I'll do after graduation? Of course! But I also recognize that I've got time to figure out the rest of my life. I'll get there.

Thanks 2013! Through all the ups and downs, you've been a helluva ride. And to those of you who did not enjoy the past year as I did, think of it as your character development year. Those hardships help make us who we are, so go into 2014 with reckless abandon, ready to ride it to its fullest heights.

Bearing the Guilt of Our Guilty Pleasures

Once again, I'm going to post what I wrote for an assignment in my Ethics of Mass Communication class, this time regarding children in entertainment. I think it's good to talk about different topics that may have some elements of controversy to them. I like the depth these types of posts add to my blog and I think it's good to ponder these issues in everyday life. Perhaps someday I'll be able to write like this without being prompted academically!

My professor liked my post so she put it on her blog as well. It's a cool site about ethics and current issues, so I highly recommend checking it out.

Most people nowadays know that reality television is not an accurate representation of reality. It frequently depicts scripted versions of ridiculous girl fights or tearful confessions. Yet these types of shows continue to be extremely popular, especially among the larger TV networks.

There is something rather addicting about watching everyday people compete for fame and fortune, or even snap at each other over seemingly shallow matters. The dysfunction of reality TV is like a train wreck; it’s horrible to watch, but hard to look away from. Seeing people fall apart has become a major form of entertainment in America.

Photo courtesy of thegeorgetownindy.com.

Within the last few years, the focus has shifted from adults humiliating themselves on national television to children doing the same thing. A prime example of this shift is the popular TLC show Toddlers and Tiaras and its spinoff series Here Comes Honey Boo Boo. These shows depict young children (almost always girls) getting dressed up with loads of makeup and hair extensions and parading around for judges. They also show these kids being kids, acting silly, throwing tantrums, and saying things that seem strange and often humorous to the adults who observe them. The humorous nature of these shows gives them enormous commercial appeal and entertainment value. But what are the ethical implications of using children for entertainment? How far is too far?

Many ethical decisions come into question when dealing with children in entertainment, but the biggest may be why so many people find dysfunctional children so entertaining in the first place. It’s like corrupting the innocence of a young person without their knowledge or consent is something to be proud of.

There are other dilemmas as well, such as issues of privacy and child labor. Some reality shows film for hours, getting footage of embarrassing meltdowns or private family moments. Children can rarely decide what is put out about them; that responsibility falls on their parents and the show’s producers. Also, even though they are encouraged to go about their “normal” lives when the cameras are rolling, the pressure of having a film crew infiltrate aspects of everyday life can create great psychological strain on a child.

Since tantrums and foul language bump up ratings, producers want children to perform for the camera in a way that will entertain the audience. This belief encourages the children on these reality TV shows to misbehave. If they think they have to act crazy or humiliate themselves to get attention and approval, how will they behave as adults? Just look at former child stars Lindsay Lohan or Amanda Bynes.

What is our responsibility as media consumers? Can we ignore unethical practices in the name of entertainment? I don’t think so. Someone needs to stand up for the children (and even adult) reality TV stars and put an end to the exploitation. For the average media consumer, taking a stand may be as simple as clicking the off button on the remote.

Eek! Some Spooky Lessons

It seems that October has been a month of professional development for yours truly. I've learned so much and met some amazing people! Networking can seem as scary as the Halloween decorations in my apartment, but it has opened doors for me that I never knew existed. The ideas and opportunities I've gained from listening to others has really inspired me. And networking gets much less frightening after the awkward introduction phase!

Happy Halloween! Scary, right?

My first major encounter with networking this semester was at the Public Relations+Social Media Summit hosted by my college earlier this month. I spend about 10 hours sitting in on presentations and panels about the communications industry, as well as connecting with other students, professors, and professionals during down time. It was an exhausting but rewarding day, and I'd like to share some of the top themes I picked out. 

• Relationships: as with most of the human race these days, the marketing and PR world revolves around relationships. Consumers trust what their friends have to say much more than what a company representative says, so things like customer service are extremely important. Want your customers to like you? Make them happy so they'll tell their friends about their experience. As Paul Rand, president and CEO of Zocalo Group, said, your brand is what consumers tell each other it is, not what you tell them it is. 
• Interaction: one of the greatest features of social media is its interactive nature. People don't just take in information that has been pushed to them; they select the information that is important to them, review it, share it, even co-create it. Many speakers talked about the immense opportunity this property of social media presents, as well as the risks it implies.
• Chaos as a ladder: this may sound like I'm quoting Game of Thrones, but risk and even crisis can present ways for companies to truly shine. Going above and beyond the typical problem solving techniques can turn a company into a thought leader. Especially with social media, which people use, as Tom Branigan, CEO of Branigan Communications, said, for both "directed and non-directed time" (for example, doing something productive like seeking information on a particular news story vs. killing time by looking through silly hashtags), risks are everywhere, but so are opportunities to flex your muscles of awesomeness. 
• Community: social media brings people together. Like the relationship function of PR, social media can build community around a company through authenticity. This means a company must be transparent, honest, and ethical when communicating with its publics. People can only gather around a brand if it is credible and its values are well defined.
• Know why: It’s not enough for a company to know what it produces or how it goes to market; it must know why. The best brands have stories behind them, sets of values that make them unique and influence every aspect of their business. As social media guru Augie Ray asserted, people don’t buy what you do, but why you do it. Have a purpose and make it real by living your brand in everything you do. 

I could go on and on about the things I learned at this conference (the presentation about Alterra changing its name to Colectivo had me at the edge of my seat!), but this post is getting lengthy as it is. I’ll conclude with something I learned from a conversation that resulted from the conference, but occurred a few days later. 

My amazing networking skills (AKA dumb luck) connected me with a professional who had worked in China, and he told me his favorite thing about the conference was the notion of “why”. The fact that more and more American businesses are being driven by a higher purpose really impressed him. While many (but not all) companies in China tend to use gimmicks to spark controversy and debate to gain attention, it seems that the trend in American social media and marketing communication is going in a more noble direction. That really fires me up! I’m excited to help bring a good name to this industry. 

Talking to new people and experiencing new things can be scary, but it's extremely rewarding. I should get in the Halloween spirit more often!

Trying Something New: Social Awareness

I recently wrote a blog post for my Communications Ethics class about the relationship of the media with Occupy Wall Street and what it means for my generation. I decided to post it here. This is a direction I usually don't go in for this blog, but after reading Occupy Nation by Todd Gitlin, I thought it might be good to bring some contemporary issues and more controversial topics to "Confessions". After all, my writing should always keep evolving, right?

Occupy Wall Street is a fascinating movement that is both rooted in and breaking away from, well, everything: history, culture, even democracy as we know it. Thanks to media platforms new and old, everybody has heard about it, yet no one can seem to fully explain it. Todd Gitlin attempts to clear up some of the confusion surrounding this complex movement in his book, Occupy Nation.

Over the last decade or so, the theme of the United States has changed from one of prosperity to one of uncertainty and frustrated hopes, especially for the middle class. As Gitlin points out, many Americans feel that “banks got bailed out, we got sold out” and that the 1 percent that holds the majority of the nation’s wealth also holds the nation’s power, which, according to our democratic system, belongs to all American citizens by right. 

Photo courtesy of CNN.com

For the other 99 percent, things are a bit bleak. The ever-present threat of post graduation loan payments and job searches are likely to strike fear in all college students. It’s said that Generation Y (of which most of my classmates and I are a part) is the first generation in about a century that will most likely not be better off financially than their parents. If you’re not just a little terrified by that, you’re lying.

With the Gen Y problem in mind, it’s no wonder that a movement composed mainly of young educated people (“They’re deep. They’re analytical. They go to the root,” Yotam Marom told Gitlin) sprung up to take down big business and big government. It’s also no surprise that OWS has utilized the media, as many movements of the past century have, to launch and maintain its campaigns. Only today, the media play a different role.

The movement would never have grown as rapidly as it did without the use of social media, something that didn’t even exist during the civil rights or antiwar movements. Everyone can participate because everything is transparent. Live streaming and live tweeting is the norm. Because of social media, OWS is out there for the world to see, if only people take the time to sort through their clogged news feeds to look.

Traditional media have tried jumping on the OWS bandwagon as well, but the movement seems to be too complex for newspapers and TV stations to keep up. They simply end up taking the “newsworthy” parts of the movement and repackaging them as ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT OCCUPY WALL STREET. This “need to know” approach by mainstream media really doesn’t do the movement justice, and certainly doesn’t do the general public any favors.

I could never begin to accurately describe such a complex movement. I’m glad we have books like Occupy Nation to explain it as it is, with its many facets and faults. Even so, Occupy can’t be our only source on the matter. In this day and age, with millions of sources of information, it’s our responsibility as media consumers to try to gain the clearest picture we can. For those of us who are, or will be, media producers, it’s our responsibility to report fairly what we can and to be honest about our biases and shortcomings. No media outlet contains the absolute truth and no one should try to pretend otherwise.

So keep consuming. Keep searching. Keep learning. Maybe we don’t all need to become hard-core activists, but if we evolve personally the way Occupy Wall Street has evolved, maybe we will learn to improve our lives. Are you ready, Gen Y?